Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Schooling year round

I wasn't sure what I was going to do the rest of this school year since it has been so hard. My 12 year old spent the year suffering through depression that I didn't know about, being bullied by who she thought was her best friend, and by February attempting suicide. I mean, what do I do! I wrote on the Ambleside Online Forum and asked for advice and between that and close friends I felt comfortable stopping all curriculum and focusing on my daughters health. But knowing that she felt like she was "stupid", "doesn't know how to spell", or "know basic math" I felt like we had to continue learning.
I am so glad I did! I set up a basket of books that I know I didn't want her to miss this school year.

 We follow so I already knew which books to pick. 12 year old books are in the wicker basket and clear basket is for my 9 year old.  Basically we will finish up those books by the end of summer before we start AO year 8 and on top of that she will do math and spelling. I was afraid this year was going to be a loss and to expect her to be very behind. But we got back her CAT scores and she is actually doing great! I was very surprised but I should of known to trust Miss Charlotte Mason. If you don't know who Charlotte Mason was or how she lives on in modern home schools today, look here

We can't have a strict school schedule right now because of so many doctor appointment for my daughter but I know we can pick up a book and read at our own pace and also listen to to the many amazing books suggested by Ambleside.
I feel so good about relaxing when we need to and focusing on school as needed. I don't feel guilty about giving my daughter a few months or even a year to work on what's more important, which is herself. She needs to build her self confidence, learn to trust in friendships again, and spend quiet time in nature and being with our Lord. By the way her EOG test showed she is NOT stupid, she spells as well as a 10th grader, and is on grade level in math.  Seeing that made her smile, it made her happy, it boosted her confidence and although I don't like the end of grade testing, this year it was completely worth it!

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Truth, Beauty and Goodness

 thinking about decisions today. I'm thinking about how fast they are made without thinking sometimes. As I was driving my daughter to gymnastics this morning I thought about basing my decision making on truth, beauty and goodness. This is what my thought process looked like...
Truth- Is the decision I am making a truthful decision? Is it based on lies or will it hurt someone in the end? Is it scriptural?
Beauty- will my decision turn ashes into beauty? Is it pure and well planned? Will it be well executed and not become ugly?
Goodness- Is the decision good? Meaning, Can I face God knowing the decision I made was good and just? Is it good for my soul? Is it good for those around me?

I think I need to pause once in a while and think over those things before any decision is made.

Just a few thoughts on this Saturday Morning.

Friday, June 5, 2015

When you think you have it all figured out

For so long I thought that I had things pretty much figured out. Things like, my husband will retire at 20 years from the military, I will homeschool my daughters until they graduate high school, we will save money and get out of debt (for the third time), and we will live happily ever after. I really thought these things! Of course I knew that there will be bumps on the road and maybe a fork or two. God decided he has other plans for us. My husband will not be retiring at 20 years but at 17 years and oh he will not receive a retirement because the Army doesn't have to do that unless you have been in 18 years. I will continue to homeschool my daughters but not without thoughts of finding a public school with a "Great Score" of 10 and seeing them off every morning on the big yellow bus. We are working on our debt but we are upside down on a house I begged my husband for, so it will be awhile. Will we live happily ever after? That's still up in the air but we will try as hard as we could.
This past year has been a roller coaster. Yes I know that is cliche to say but it has been.
My oldest daughter is away at college, my 12 year old was diagnosed with Depression, anxiety and Hashimotos Thyroiditis, my 9 year old spends 12-15 hours a week at gymnastics and we travel a distance to get there.
We have hit mid year and my husbands career is up in the air, my daughters depression seems to be getting better but her thyroid issues are not quite fixed, and my 9 year old is still at gymnastics. I'm scared for our family because the loss of my husbands job means a loss of health insurance. A loss of my husbands job means I may have to send my kids back to school so I can get a J-O-B. No big deal you say about the J-O-B but I haven't worked in 13 years!
I don't know what we will do. I have trust in God and trust in my husband. I trust that God will lead us through this with His absolute wisdom and love. I trust my husband will remain a hard worker and do what he needs to do to provide for us. I will continue to help in anyway I can and I will continue to homeschool unless I no longer can. I will trust in God with all my heart, soul, and mind, ask for peace that surpasses all understanding and Trust in the Lord.